Are You Becoming A Relationship Threat?
Drama Queen behavior can lead to the destruction of relationships and can even keep you from achieving your goals. We all need to feel validated and valued, but when our need for attention outweighs our need for healthy relationships we need to make some serious changes. Being a drama queen can leave others around you feeling exhausted and wanting distance.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 1 - I Can Top That Mentality
Do you ever listen to someone tell a story and think to yourself - " yeah but i did xyz" Hell you may even say it aloud. If so ; then you my friend- are a drama queen, and pretty self- righteous one at that. People know you have done great things, but stealing the limelight from someone else only makes them feel beneath you. This is not constructive for relationships. Save your story for another time and share it when it doesn't belittle the other person. It's not healthy to think it either, but the mind can be a tricky place. So even if you are thinking you can top their story, try to focus in on what they are saying. You may even want to try repeating something they mentioned in the story to let them know you were paying attention. Let them shine for a moment, and then blow them away later. This simple task will help you to keep your relationships intact and healthy.
Do you ever listen to someone tell a story and think to yourself - " yeah but i did xyz" Hell you may even say it aloud. If so ; then you my friend- are a drama queen, and pretty self- righteous one at that. People know you have done great things, but stealing the limelight from someone else only makes them feel beneath you. This is not constructive for relationships. Save your story for another time and share it when it doesn't belittle the other person. It's not healthy to think it either, but the mind can be a tricky place. So even if you are thinking you can top their story, try to focus in on what they are saying. You may even want to try repeating something they mentioned in the story to let them know you were paying attention. Let them shine for a moment, and then blow them away later. This simple task will help you to keep your relationships intact and healthy.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 2 - You Thrive On Crisis
It's a great thing to be there for others in a time of crisis, it quite another to seek it out. If you are looking forward to the next breakup or makeup in your relationships, you need to do some serious self reflecting. Enjoying others pain or even your own can be a sign of some underlying psychological issues. Overcoming tragedy and trauma is a beautiful skill set and can be used in some truly amazing ways, but it's never okay to create it. If you are starting drama intentionally, you should consider finding a sport or hobby that you find fulfilling. Or choose a career like psychology where you can put this skill set to good use. If you are doing all of these things but are still starting fires in your relationships seek out a therapist who can guide you through the issue.
Find a therapist in your area. www.psychologytoday.com
It's a great thing to be there for others in a time of crisis, it quite another to seek it out. If you are looking forward to the next breakup or makeup in your relationships, you need to do some serious self reflecting. Enjoying others pain or even your own can be a sign of some underlying psychological issues. Overcoming tragedy and trauma is a beautiful skill set and can be used in some truly amazing ways, but it's never okay to create it. If you are starting drama intentionally, you should consider finding a sport or hobby that you find fulfilling. Or choose a career like psychology where you can put this skill set to good use. If you are doing all of these things but are still starting fires in your relationships seek out a therapist who can guide you through the issue.
Find a therapist in your area. www.psychologytoday.com
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 3 - You Personalize Things That Aren't Personal
" I think we should go to the movies instead of shopping." - If conversations like this send you spiraling into thinking they don't like your ideas or don't like you - it's time to take a giant step backward. Not all actions and statements are a direct reflection on who you are as an individual. And negative thinking will not help the situation. Before spiraling into outrageous thoughts and self-deprecating, take a breath, and try to imagine a way of how what someone said couldn't be related to you. If you can't come up with an answer, and are still feeling hurt- ask them what they may have meant. Communication in any type of relationship can keep you from getting upset about something that you shouldn't.
" I think we should go to the movies instead of shopping." - If conversations like this send you spiraling into thinking they don't like your ideas or don't like you - it's time to take a giant step backward. Not all actions and statements are a direct reflection on who you are as an individual. And negative thinking will not help the situation. Before spiraling into outrageous thoughts and self-deprecating, take a breath, and try to imagine a way of how what someone said couldn't be related to you. If you can't come up with an answer, and are still feeling hurt- ask them what they may have meant. Communication in any type of relationship can keep you from getting upset about something that you shouldn't.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign #4 - You Feel The Need To Control
Hold it right there A type personality. Are you in control of everything - including your relationships? Relinquish the reigns a little, I know it can be a struggle and frustrating as hell to give others control - especially when you think you will be more effective at the task- but there needs to a level of compromise when dealing with others. Yelling and force just make others feel insignificant and unimportant. Start with the small stuff and work your way to the big stuff. Let him/her pick the restaurant or movie as a start.
Hold it right there A type personality. Are you in control of everything - including your relationships? Relinquish the reigns a little, I know it can be a struggle and frustrating as hell to give others control - especially when you think you will be more effective at the task- but there needs to a level of compromise when dealing with others. Yelling and force just make others feel insignificant and unimportant. Start with the small stuff and work your way to the big stuff. Let him/her pick the restaurant or movie as a start.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 5 - You Feel Mistreated and Taken Advantage Of
If everything seems to be unfair simply because it doesn't go your way. Or you suffer from what I like to call " I'm Perfect" syndrome- read on. Everyone makes mistakes and being able to own up to the will make others admire you. Even better, identify your mistakes and fix them. Deflecting the problem doesn't make it go away, it just frustrates others around you. They will lose respect for you and think of you as immature. I'm going to go ahead and make the assumption that you don't want to be portrayed this way. So here's an exercise I recommend. .In every situation imagine how you could be responsible. Even if it's something seemingly out of your control. For instance - a car runs into you when they run a red light.. how could you be responsible for this situation? This exercise will encourage your mind to begin stepping away from "poor me".
If everything seems to be unfair simply because it doesn't go your way. Or you suffer from what I like to call " I'm Perfect" syndrome- read on. Everyone makes mistakes and being able to own up to the will make others admire you. Even better, identify your mistakes and fix them. Deflecting the problem doesn't make it go away, it just frustrates others around you. They will lose respect for you and think of you as immature. I'm going to go ahead and make the assumption that you don't want to be portrayed this way. So here's an exercise I recommend. .In every situation imagine how you could be responsible. Even if it's something seemingly out of your control. For instance - a car runs into you when they run a red light.. how could you be responsible for this situation? This exercise will encourage your mind to begin stepping away from "poor me".
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 6- You Are Easily Overwhelmed or Distraught
Ah the typical drama queen symptom! As women we are already naturally a little on the emotional side. Add in a dash of P.M.S and you've got a deadly combo. But if you are woman who is constantly in a state of distress.. red flag. This over exaggerated state of emotions will lead your relationships to destruction. People will begin to care less and less when you begin an outburst. If you are genuinely feeling upset over what others consider to be "no big deal" situations you may want to consider speaking with a doctor. You could have a chemical imbalance, which is a surprising easy fix. If you aren't interested in seeking help next time you get upset - i know it's going to be hard- but take 10 deep breaths. If after those 10 deep breaths you are still upset, talk to someone.
Ah the typical drama queen symptom! As women we are already naturally a little on the emotional side. Add in a dash of P.M.S and you've got a deadly combo. But if you are woman who is constantly in a state of distress.. red flag. This over exaggerated state of emotions will lead your relationships to destruction. People will begin to care less and less when you begin an outburst. If you are genuinely feeling upset over what others consider to be "no big deal" situations you may want to consider speaking with a doctor. You could have a chemical imbalance, which is a surprising easy fix. If you aren't interested in seeking help next time you get upset - i know it's going to be hard- but take 10 deep breaths. If after those 10 deep breaths you are still upset, talk to someone.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 7- You are Responsible for Everyones Happiness
Assuming responsibility for everyones happiness is an exhausting task and the truth is.. you can't make everyone happy. This process will only compromise your feelings, ideas, and individuality. You don't need to make up stories or always be in control of a conversation to make others happy. Relax. Take a step back and allow others the opportunity to entertain and be the star of the conversations.
Assuming responsibility for everyones happiness is an exhausting task and the truth is.. you can't make everyone happy. This process will only compromise your feelings, ideas, and individuality. You don't need to make up stories or always be in control of a conversation to make others happy. Relax. Take a step back and allow others the opportunity to entertain and be the star of the conversations.
Drama Queen Behavior Sign # 8 - You Obsess About Your Looks
There is a difference between caring about your beauty and letting others perceptions control your existence. If you can't leave the house without a pocket mirror and spend hours getting ready for a simple task like going to the grocery store.. you have developed a problem. An overload of vanity can put strain on your relationships. Focusing the majority of your energy on yourself can make others feel unworthy and create distance. Leave the mirrors at home, and start developing some inner beauty qualities so your exterior isn't all you have to focus on.
There is a difference between caring about your beauty and letting others perceptions control your existence. If you can't leave the house without a pocket mirror and spend hours getting ready for a simple task like going to the grocery store.. you have developed a problem. An overload of vanity can put strain on your relationships. Focusing the majority of your energy on yourself can make others feel unworthy and create distance. Leave the mirrors at home, and start developing some inner beauty qualities so your exterior isn't all you have to focus on.
Don't Be Afraid To Be Beautiful,
Sydney Day
Sydney Day